Challenging Assumptions: My Anxiety Triggers

Anxiety is complex. You may not know what it means when I tell you that I have Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Agoraphobia, Panic Disorder and Social Anxiety Disorder [click the links to learn more]. In short, my anxiety disorders lead me to react with excessive anxiety to triggers that do not always merit an anxious response. Anxiety permeates every aspect of my life, it is far more than a desire stay home and avoid social gatherings. I hope that in sharing my list of anxiety triggers I will help shed some light on how debilitating anxiety can be and hopefully challenge some false assumptions along the way.

The triggers listed below are my own – anxiety triggers differ greatly from person to person. The items on this list vary in their severity and the frequency at which they provoke my anxiety and panic. They are not all things I dislike or am afraid of, in fact many of them are things that I really like. In some cases I have a good understanding of why these triggers cause me distress, in other cases I have no idea. With all that in mind, here is a list of some of the things that trigger my anxiety and panic.


The List

Appointments

Being far from home

Being in the same space as other people

Caffeine

Cars

Changes in plans

Changes in temperature

Clicking publish or send on any form of online communication

Conflict (even if I’m not involved)

Discussing finances

Elevators

Excess stimuli

Feeling as though I can’t escape

Grocery stores

Hospitals

Intense sensations

Lack of sleep

Large groups of people

Leaving the house

Making mistakes

Malls

News (good or bad)

Not having a plan

Open spaces

Parties

Phone calls

Portrayals of suicide in media

Scary fictional stories

Seeing neighbours through the windows

Showering

Small groups of people

Talking in person

The dark

The outdoors

Unexpected noises

Walks


You may now be wondering how it is possible to be so sensitive and easily provoked to panic. I wish I could explain that to you. If you haven’t experienced an anxiety disorder you probably won’t understand what it is like to feel anxious, as though something truly awful might happen, in response to mundane things in your daily life. I have had Generalized Anxiety Disorder and Panic Disorder for many years, Agoraphobia and Social Anxiety Disorder are newer to me. I am still learning to understand my own anxiety and how to best manage it. It makes very little sense to me that I can become dizzy and hot, hyperventilate, have chest pain, feel weakness in my legs, shake, be disoriented and feel as though I am in imminent danger as a result of things as unthreatening as reading positive news articles. Being constantly anxious has had negative impacts on both my physical and mental health. Irritability, weight gain, hair thinning, moodiness, headaches, seclusion and muscle tension are just a few of the negative changes that my anxiety has contributed to. Anxiety has hugely impacted my life and my relationships.

Even if I employ as much planning and as many coping tools as possible, it is inevitable that I will come in contact with my triggers throughout my day and respond with anxiety. I have lived in near-constant anxiety for a couple of years now, because there is always a chance that one of these many triggers is just around the corner. The anticipation of something anxiety-provoking is often just as bad as the thing I am anticipating. Additionally, I still frequently experience increased anxiety or panic attacks without any identifiable trigger. I am slowly learning to tolerate my anxiety and panic, but my anxiety remains exhausting and incapacitating even as my ability to withstand the distress increases.

I write this because anxiety is misunderstood. When most people think of anxiety disorders they likely don’t imagine someone having a panic attack every time they shower without understanding why. You may not know that there are people like me who have been working for years towards goals like going outside for walks. The best way to understand how anxiety disorders affect someone’s life is to ask them about it, anxiety is a deeply personal experience. It can be easy to reduce anxiety disorders to chronic fear or nervousness: emotions that we can all understand. Anxiety is so much more than that, even I don’t fully understand it yet.

Take care,

Fiona

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12 thoughts on “Challenging Assumptions: My Anxiety Triggers

  1. What a thoughtful and well written explanation. Even as an anxiety sufferer myself, it’s still really interesting to hear others’ stories, especially triggers. I don’t know if I’m even aware enough to identify half of mine, so your ability to do so is really admirable. I hope you’re able to find some way to work through them in the future. Thank you for sharing xx

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you. I had to dig to identify my triggers after a huge increase in my anxiety a couple of years ago. I’m positive I still have plenty of unidentified triggers. I’ve found some things that help, but I’m still on the hunt for solutions that work for me. Thanks for taking the time to read and comment! xx

      Like

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